Saturday Night Live released its long-awaited “Adventures of Young Ben Carson” skit last night. The skit featured Jay Pharoah as a young Ben Carson. It was set in Carson’s hometown of Detroit, Michigan back in 1968. SNL focused on one of Carson’s most popular “Tall Tales,” which involved Carson “allegedly” stabbing someone as a youth.
However, it was very fortunate for Carson’s would be victim that he happened to be wearing a belt. Apparently Carson was very particular about stabbing people on the belt line.
The skit also features Carson’s mom. After chastising Carson, he tries to hit her with a hammer. But Black Jesus steps in to save her in the nick of time! Carson and Black Jesus become the best of friends, taking portraits together during all of Carson’s proudest moments.
The skit is filled with numerous references to crazy things Carson, the current number two candidate for the GOP presidential nomination, has said throughout the years. Let’s take a look and compare SNL’s Ben Carson to the real Ben Carson.
SNL’s Ben Carson: “Yeah, what are you doing in this neighborhood? Like a Muslim in the White House, you don’t belong.”
Real Ben Carson: “I would not advocate that we put a Muslim in charge of this nation. I absolutely would not agree with that.”
SNL’s Ben Carson: “I can’t go to prison Ma-ma. People go to prison straight and come out gay. I’m not ready to be gay.”
Real Ben Carson: “Because a lot of people who go into prison go into prison straight — and when they come out, they’re gay. So, did something happen while they were in there? Ask yourself that question.”
SNL’s Ben Carson: “But evolution isn’t real or we’d have the fossils to prove it, and those fossils don’t exist.”
Real Ben Carson: “You know, they look at all those layers, and then they find some fossils in one of the layers, and they say this fossil is this many years old because it’s in this layer. So, that means this fossil is like a million years old
‘Well, this layer is a million years old because this fossil which is a million years old is in it.’ You know, that’s like saying, you know, ‘the sky can be red or blue.’ And you say, well, the sky is blue. And you say why is it blue? ‘Because it is not red.’ Well, why is it not red? ‘Because it’s blue.’ Yeah, you know, that’s known as circular reasoning. That’s how they explain the age of all these things, it’s very circular reasoning, and really it has no real scientific validity.”
SNL’s Ben Carson: “We went to Egypt and saw the ancient grain silos.”
Real Ben Carson: “My own personal theory is that Joseph built the pyramids to store grain. Now all the archeologists think that they were made for the pharaohs’ graves. But, you know, it would have to be something awfully big if you stop and think about it.”
SNL’s Ben Carson: “Everything Black Jesus said came true. I became a respected surgeon and a multimillionaire. All in a America that today is very much like Nazi Germany.”
Real Ben Carson: “I mean, [we are] very much like Nazi Germany. And I know you’re not supposed to say ‘NaziGermany,’ but I don’t care about political correctness. You know, you had a government using its tools to intimidate the population. We now live in a society where people are afraid to say what they actually believe.”
You know it’s bad when SNL creates a satire character who comes across as saner than the person they are making fun of.